I felt like I just celebrated my 35th birthday not so long ago, but now, I'm already 36 years old. Where has the time gone? I thought I would have a quiet, low-key birthday celebration this year with just one or two closest friends. But I ended up having many birthday celebrations instead. I'm not complaining.

We started with a yacht birthday party in the morning. (Thanks to my BFF Stefanie for arranging everything, and to everyone for spending their time to celebrate with me! I'm so touched). I just needed to bring my bikini and show up. We had a delicious birthday cake from American Express, too much wine, a good dose of vitamin sea, and endless laughter. 

The weather had been gloomy with heavy rain all week, and the sun came on out my birthday to play. I also wanted to thank Mr. Ang, owner of  No Name Yachts Pte Ltd, and his team for taking a good care of us that day. We had a great time. It was so perfect. 

My initial plan of having a quiet birthday was spending the weekend at Marina Bay Sands hotel, swimming at the sky infinity pool, reading books, or going for a walk at the Gardens by the bay. But, nothing can be quite quiet when my girl, Stefanie, shows up. In a good way, of course. She always brings sunshine wherever she goes. We checked in the hotel room just enough time for me to have an important meeting that I couldn't afford to skip. The hotel also offered the birthday girl a free upgrade to Deluxe room with a sky-view (exactly how I wanted) and sweetened my stay with a surprise birthday cake. Then, we had another birthday cake when we had lunch the next day at one of the restaurants. 

    

In the evening, I went out to have dinner at an Italian restaurant with my friends and colleagues. Thanks to Stefanie for arranging this again! Mazzo restaurant team surprised me with a flamingo Lamborghini shot and a delicious birthday cake. Thank you, Patrick & Mazzo team! I had way too much fun that night. My jaw hurt from laughing too much.      

The next day, Stef and I had a morning swim at the famous infinity pool, took a couple of photos, and enjoyed the city view while sipping our cup of coffee. We didn't get to stay long as our appointment slot was only for one hour per day. Who would have thought that we had to make an advanced booking to swim at the hotel pool before? But this is the reality we live in now during the pandemic. A lot of adjustments, changes, new rules applied. I did what I wanted to, and I was happy, regardless. 

After the swim, we had lunch at the hotel restaurant and went to the casino right after because Stef was feeling lucky. Thirty minutes later, we walked out of the casino with an extra $200 in Stef's wallet. It's my birthday. Of course, everyone is feeling lucky! At least, I like to think so. 

At night, we went to have drinks and dinner with my good friend, Javi, at the Fairmont hotel. Not only did I have a great laugh, but I also had another birthday cake, and a happy birthday song sang in Spanish, by the most fun & good looking Spanish man, I know. A big hug and thanks to Emmanuel, General Manager of Fairmont hotel, for the champagne. 

On day 3 of my 36 years old, I celebrated with two women whom I dearly love and admire. There are not enough words to express how grateful I am for their support, patience, and guidance in the last three years. They watched me grow and celebrated with me every important milestone in my career and now personal. 

Have I done all the celebrations yet? Probably not. I'm the kind of person who, if I can wake up and be happy every day, I will celebrate no matter how big or small. But every birthday, it's a chance for me to reflect, to look deep into my soul (and sometimes my insecurities), to question myself, "How much have I grown?", "What have I accomplished?" "Am I happy?". Then, I started looking back at old photos. 

The photo on the left was Crystal 2.0 ten years ago. She was young, innocent, ambitious, energetic, and impatient. The image on the right is the Crystal 3.0 now. She is still young at heart, more experienced, always ambitious, more patient, understanding, and compassionate. What have I lost over the last ten years? Perhaps, the insecurity about my flaws, the doubts about my ability, the negativity when I hit the roadblocks, and the need to find someone make me happy. What have I gained on the contrary? Some wrinkles on my face, a few pounds on my body, a lot more patience and emotional maturity, and a longer list of work-life experiences, and the contentment in life that is so hard to find. 

There will still be days when PMS syndrome hits me; I'll feel like I've not accomplished enough, I won't have time to achieve all the goals I set for myself, I haven't spent much time with the family, where will I be in the next 5 and 10 years, and the list goes on. But as soon as those doubtful feelings got me, I quickly realised that the hormones rollercoaster is trying to give me an emotional ride. I can let it swing my mood up and down, or I can choose to say, "Stop it. It's enough". Whether I'm at v2.0 or v3.0, I'm still fighting my own battles every day like everybody else. But at 36 years old, I learn to choose what's worth fighting for and what to let go. I'm lucky to be surrounded by many great people. Some help me before even meeting me in person. Some spoil me with their love and support. Some help me to grow from my mistakes. Some motivate me to go after my dreams. Some push me out of my comfort zone. My memory sucks, but I'll never forget these names. 

I'm always a work in progress because I'm nowhere near perfect, and I will never be. But I know what I'll bring to the table, and I'm not afraid to express myself. I love the woman I've become, and I am enough. 

As always, thank you for reading! To all my beautiful friends, thank you for being a part of my journey! 

They say good friends are like stars. You don't always see them, but you know they are there. I'm lucky that I have many shining stars around me. They are there during my good and bad time. They don't just lend me their listening ears. They offer their helping hands when I need. I wonder “what have I done in my previous life that I have many guardian angels with me in this life.” They are like my brothers and sisters. Some I know for more than ten years, others I meet less than a year but feel like we already knew each other for a long time. I’ll probably have more bridesmaids than I need by the time I decide to be a bride. I'm not complaining. It's a happy problem to have.



Every girl loves being a princess on her wedding day. Some take a longer time to find their true love story than others. I’m very good at managing other parts of my life (Work, Health, Family), Love is the only thing that makes me feel out of control. I lost count how many times in the past 16 years (since I started dating), I looked up at the sky and wondered: "Where and who is my Prince Charming? Why it’s so hard to meet him?". Every time I fell in love, I had my heart broken over and over again. After so many heartbreaks and lessons, I learned that Love is not just a feeling. It's not just a word. It's not about the number of expensive presents a guy gives you. It's a choice, a commitment, and an action. We chose to love someone and accept them for who they are, including their flaws. Loving someone means we'll do everything we can to make the other person happy. We are inspired to be a better version of ourselves. We are willing to stay with them during the tough times and be their best supporter. In one of my love stories, I came to realize that loving someone also means letting them go and wishing them all the happiness whether you are a part of it. They say “God knows when you are ready for a marriage, he'll send the right man to you at the right time.” Apparently, I wasn't ready.


I wanted to get married at the age of 25. It didn't happen. I set my marriage goal at 27 years old. Again, I broke up. The same thing happened when I was 29 and 30 years old. All these years, I asked myself "Why do I want to get married?". The answers were: I want to get married because I'm getting old; My parents want me to get married; I need to find stability and security, and the list goes on". None of the answers was "I want to spend the rest of my life with him." Not that I didn't have a feeling for any of my ex-boyfriends at that time, I just had too many doubts and fear in my head. I didn't feel "right" like what everyone kept telling me "You'll know it if he is the right one."  So I walked away before things got worse and wanted to focus on loving myself first before I can love someone else.



Now,  I still don’t know if and when I will get married, but I no longer have the pressure of "I'm getting old" or "My parents want me to get married." I'm self-sufficient and enjoying my single life to its fullest. I love myself and I'm content with what I have. I don't need a man to give me financial stability. I'm not looking for a man to bring me happiness because I'm already happy. When I think of getting married to someone, I think of how much I want to share my positivity, joy, and my life with that person. Life is not always sunshine and butterflies. I won't mind going through storms with that person as long as he respects, trusts, and loves me as his life partner. A great relationship requires hard work, open communications, honesty, and a whole lot of bedtime activities. I get that.